It was my 31st birthday yesterday. I was treated like a princess and it was wonderful, but it was another birthday without children. My husband and I have been doing some planning about the future and about us becoming parents.
We have decided that we’re going to sell our flat and my father in law sell his house and we’ll look for a bigger house together. My father in law is 73 and comes up between 3 and 5 times a week. My husband sees him every day. I’m excited that we’re buying a house which we’re planning to be our family home. We just need to find the right house now! Its going to be our children’s home, it is going to be where we spend our first Christmas and their first birthdays. I know I’m being idealistic about it all, I’m not looking at this with rose tinted glasses. I know it isn’t going to be an easy journey, but I’ve gotten this far already and I’m still standing!
In preparation for Endometriosis Awareness Month, I’ve spoken to the lovely Natalie at http://www.fertilitypodcast.com and told my story – spending time to explain how I’ve got to where I am is somewhat cathartic. I just hope that by telling people what’s happened to me, that no one else will go through what I’ve been through.
On a positive, I’ve started a Twitter account just about our adoption journey; I’m planning on using it to connect with others going through the adoption process as well as using it for research. If you want to follow, feel free to send me a request @kfindingmyheart
Whilst it has been my birthday, my Endometriosis has been giving me a hard time. The pain has been a b*tch and fatigue has also been fairly horrendous. My husband has been amazing, I count my lucky stars every day that I married the most wonderful man.
I’ve kind of fallen off the weight loss wagon a bit the last few weeks, we’ve got a family get together over the weekend so Monday morning I’m going to be on it and even stricter with myself. My plan is to stick to 1200-1400 calories a day and to cut out alcohol. I’m also going to restart doing yoga. I found myself much stronger physically when doing it before and so I’m hoping that it’ll help again.
I have to do this now, I have to do this for my children, wherever they are and whether they’re alive yet or not.